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For Nene, now in U.P. Campus

 

I see no signs of you

Here and now.

The mornings are silent again.

Dr. Hook doesn’t sing

His sweetest-of-all lyrics anymore.

The evenings are scentless again.

Though the bed sheet smells new

The red blankets never share your warmth.

The days are terribly calm again.

Your brown shoes beneath the green box

Are now dusted, unpolished, ignored.

 

I won’t want to retrieve them now

Or have them fixed downtown.

I know it will soon leave my mind, easily.

 

You forgot one thing when you left--the door, ajar.

 

 

February 1998

At the Barrio Cemetery

Official Selection, Poetry in English, 15th Iligan National Writers Workshop sponsored by the National Commission for Culture and the Arts (NCCA) and the Mindanao State University-Iligan Institute of Technology (MSU-IIT), May 26-30, 2008.

The men are digging up my father’s grave.

My folks decided to join Father’s and Mother’s remains

in one resting place. It’d be best for all of us, they said.

All the gravediggers find are scattered bones,

a clump of hair and tattered pieces of cloth.

The men sighed relief, perhaps from exhaustion,

except me, now wondering how poor

Father and Mother really were

at the sight of such nothing-ness.




























*To Manuel Cepe Manaog [1943-1978]

Leaving Normal

Just before you bring the last box

of your things to the taxi waiting

outside, make sure the glass-table

they lent you is wiped clean, spotless

like your head free of yesterday’s

they-ask-you-answer dialogue

with the committee. No words will be

said, not a word will have to seek

their approval. Dust off the last shelf

and don’t you go and forget the books,

scissors and things you lent them.

Empty your basket, too, of all trash

so the other bins filled to the brim

next to your table utter nothing,

with their unfeeling mouths,

as you now head toward the door.

The driver’s sounding his horn by the gate

so just run past the guard you warmly

greeted, coming in this morning; well,

refuse his hand to carry your stuff

but remember friendship for good.

Seated in the car now, take comfort

in the cushioned couch, wiping off 

the dust gathered on your palms.

Encanto*

Childhood is an abandoned pathway
leading to the old molino,
where you hid from Nora and Tonio,
your neighbor’s children who never found you
after you crawled into the kawayan
where Primitivo, the encanto, lived.

Your playmates lost you, sorely,
and never knew where you went
until dusk when your brother found you
in filthy clothes, your face spent as ash,
hardly breathing near the kamalig.

No one cared, then, if you still knew
night from day. You were possessed
by the primitive spirit, your folks said.
Hardly sober, you looked for
your Lolo Kanor the whole evening,
and then kissed his hand a hundred times.

Everywhere you went after that taraguan,
you’ve always sought to hide, maybe scared
of being seen or found—out in the recesses
of the subdivision; in the college parking lot;
inside a dilapidated movie house; all over
the city streets of ill-repute. You were
looking for Primitivo, the savage
spirit that enchanted you, they said.